Dear People of Snow-Bound Areas,
Why do you lose your minds? Why? Yesterday, I needed to pick up some essentials at the food store before the second half of this one-two punch storm came through. Like many of you, I thought it wise to accomplish this in the afternoon before the bad weather arrived in the area. Why this means that the otherwise pleasant aisles of my local Shop Rite turned into a disaster area looting site, I do not know.
Mothers, I saw your carts careening, babies thrown willy-nilly as you played Supermarket Sweep in your head: FORMULA! DIAPERS! MUFFINS! CHOCOLATE! All I could do was pull my cart over and stay the hell out of your way, psychos. And just barely.
Elderly people, you at least maintained the same slow pace, clogged the aisles with your double-parked carts, and blocked entire displays of canned fruit. The problem, of course, in this unique situation is that you also blocked the emergency pull-offs for the rest of us, leaving us at the mercy of the zooming shoppers.
And why do people lose all conception of where things are? I must have seen the same woman pass me like five times going from one end of the store to the other and back again to pick up who knows what. MILK! WHERE IS THE MILK? WHERE IS THE COLD STUFF!
I was so happy to get out of there and come home. I can only imagine what it was like when the 9-to-fivers started filling the stores on their way home, heavy snow imminent. Oy.
And so, People of Snow-Bound Areas, I hope you enjoy your stash of goodies picked up yesterday, and in case you're wondering, that toe you ran over will be just fine.
1 comment:
AH yes! Dad saw someone with a cart of like 40 gallons of milk and we can only hope he was a Good Samaritan buying for his entire neighborhood because as you mentioned to me the other a cashier was talking to one of your pals saying if power goes out the milk will spoil, unless they put it out in the snow perhaps????? LOL! Hope your toe IS fine.
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